The Smurf

The Enduring Apprentice.

Race	Spazmite / Dwarf-hybrid
Hotness	3-5
Body Count	1 (+-)
Politics	Left
RizzForce Level	4
GoonMajick Level	7

The Smurf is a fallen and depressed creature bred out of the Age of Western decline. He does not care for battle nor dominion, but for servitude under dark female creatures. Unlike the Spazmite, who leeches off of females for sex, money and comfort, the Smurf is a willing thrall. He labors hard, like the Warlock, to appease his Master—a sorceress who grants him not love, but tokens: a smile, a kiss, and perhaps sex when she is depressed after a Poacher has run-through her and left her wanting more. Once in a blue moon, when she gives flesh without heart, the Smurf revels in it, as if crowned. But lo, when the Poacher arrives—the enchantress discards her Smurf faster than her dress coming off for a masculine man. One blink of her painted eye, and he is cast off, forgotten, like a page torn from the Book of Fools.

He offers his money, his home, and his soul on bended knee for crumbs of affection from dark enchantresses who feast upon his loyalty. –Saint Beldábeard

Where to find	Everywhere. Becoming the average male of the West.
Body Count	Sex is an addiction.
Pro Life	Uses abortion to avoid responsibility or may desire a child to entrap a female.
HypnoTech Majick	Very High. Uses it to stalk and shower females with compliments.
Goon Majick	Very High. He is a jealous creature that desires strongly to lock down a female.
K-OS Virus	Is sick with the disease and loves to relate to females who also have it.
Boons	Loyal
Snags	An effeminate creature